Archive for the ‘Hardworking Hubby’ Category

I know by now, many of you are probably wondering how my tale of Christmas 2009 ended.

I have received many inquiries as to how we finally gained access to our home.
Did we call the fire department?
Did we call a locksmith?
Did we break a window?
Did we finally get a hold of the E.A.R.L.?

Well….of all of those options…..None are the correct answer.

After going through every key my mom had in her house, checking every door and window only to discover that our house was locked up tight, my Hardworking Hubby did the only thing we could do. He took all of his Tae Kwon Do techniques that he has learned over the years (he’s a 2nd degree black belt), walked around to the side of our garage, raised his leg and lined it up just perfect and kicked the door precisely at the knob and low and behold….We.Were.Finally.In.Our.Garage.

There was minimal damage (thank god, because if the E.A.R.L. were to ever notice, we’d be dead for sure.)

I’m thinking it’s also a good thing that we didn’t lock the door from the garage to the house because then we would have been royally screwed!

After our successful break-in, we headed off to my parents house to spend Christmas with my mom’s side of the family and partake in the White Elephant exchange. I was lucky enough to win my old corded phone, Circa ohmahgawd I had that phone when I was a teenager, in addition to a 2008/2009 Phonebook. Check it out.

It came complete with the phone numbers of all my old friends, boyfriends etcetera. How much better could Christmas get?

There was a brief conversation with my Grandmother (I.WAS.SHOCKED.) She even referred to my children by their actual names. The only part she didn’t succeed at was when she opened her gift from us, a frame with pictures of my children, she pointed at the Drama Queen in the picture and referred to her as Anne (me).

After the festivities at my parent’s house, I returned home, sent the kiddos off to bed and went on my merry way to prepare for Santa (Read: Put out all gifts from Santa by myself, stuff stockings and remove all refuse from the house while everyone else sleeps including the Hardworking Hubby).

At approximately 11:03 pm my head hit my pillow after having been awake for over 36 hours. I am told that by 11:05, I was asleep.

The kids slept until 7:00am (1st time ever!!! on Christmas Day!!!!) and then we were off to open all of their worldly treasures from the man in the suit.

(EPIC MOM FAIL AHEAD)

This is the part were I would normally share pictures with you of 3 children ripping gifts open and creating a HUGE mess of wrapping paper, packaging and twist ties in addition to candy wrappers spread across my house.

But.

Yes, there is a but.

I was a bad parent this year and failed to retrieve my camera and take any pictures of my children opening their gifts.

Bad mommy!

Moving on.

After their gifts were open, batteries inserted, and all things assembled, I passed the fuck out on the couch until 11:00am.

Once I got up, it was a race to shower, get dressed and arrive at my in-laws by noon for a yummy Christmas Day lunch of Ham and scalloped potatoes, Cauliflower & Broccoli with cheese sauce, Ham, Chicken Parmigiana, stuffed mushrooms, chutney, caramelized onions and bread pudding. It was scrumdiddlyumptious!

So, after eating eleventy billion plates full of food, the kids finished opening the remainder of their gifts from the grandparents, we loaded everything and everyone up and made our way home to empty the contents of the truck and off to my parents, this time to spend Christmas with my parents, sister and brother-in-law.

We open what seemed like a pile of never ending presents.

I was THRILLED to get new bedding from my parents along with some other great things (like a sweet ass bag for our New York trip in 2010 for BlogHer10).

Once all was said and done we had our Christmas dinner (pizza from Papa Murphys) and again stuffed ourselves silly.

Zman & The Drama Queen remained at my parents house for the night while the Hardworking Hubby, myself and the Tatertot made our way home.

All in all it was a good, exhausting but fun Christmas.

I’ve been trying to figure out how I managed to survive it all and remain sane.
I would like to say that it was the alcohol and I drank myself into a drunken stupor.
But I can’t even use that excuse because I NEVER had time to enjoy an alcoholic beverage.
I did this all on numerous cans of Diet Cherry Pepsi.
Oh and the awesomeness that was the Twice Baked Potato Casserole I made!

Hope your Christmas was a great as ours!

Here is where my story continues…..

We arrived at my in-laws house right around 9am.
The kids were all charged up to open the gifts from Grandma, Grandpa and Auntie.
Ok……so was my hubby.
As for me…..I was still worried about that little itty bitty detail that you know….WE.ARE.LOCKED.OUT.OF.OUR.HOUSE.ON.CHRISTMAS.EVE.
Not like it was a big deal or anything.
Just the night that Santa Claus is to come to my house and deliver presents to our children.
Again….no biggie.
Right.
We opened gift after gift after gift after gift at my in-laws.
The kids were thrilled with their new toys, video games, movies etc.
The Hardworking Hubby was ecstatic to finally have Season 6,7 and 8 of Smallville in his possession.
Me. I was IN.LOVE. with my new toaster.
All in all we had a good time.

From there, we hurried to load the truck and head North to Great Grandma’s house for lunch, more family and more gifts.
Again, I shared the tale of how we were currently locked out of our home and that the spare keys didn’t work and our Landlords were not home.

By 2:30pm we were finished up North, loaded everyone in the truck once again to journey home.
On the way, we drove past our landlords house in hopes that they were home.
Of course.
They were not.

We continued home with the plan of finding a way into our house.

More to come tomorrow….

2 Years ago today,

this happened

and then my little family with these two

became our little family of 4 (technically 5 if you count that little Tatertot in my tummy!)

Yes, 2 years ago today, I married my best friend and all though there have been bumps in the road, I have enjoyed every last minute of it!

I love you Hardworking Hubby!
Happy Anniversary!

This post is co-authored by Hardworking Hubby

Part 1- By Anne

Since the weekend of 9/11, the E.A.R.L. has been a major pain in the ass around here.
It started when they came to paint the side of our house that Friday. (Even though they painted the ENTIRE exterior a year ago).
They were here for the whole day.
Hanging out on the side on our house painting and whatnot while we had our garage sale.
For the most part, they were kind.
Minus the bitching about the helicopters and grass in the rock bed.

They came back the following Tuesday and painted the other end of the house.
This did not affect us at all since we hid out inside ALL DAY!

Then they called so they could paint around the garage and the overhang.
They had planned to do it that Friday.
We planned our garage sale again.
Instead, they came and laid sod on the side of the house since the grass was gone.

Fast forward to Tuesday of this week.

Part 2- By Hardworking Hubby

Then my WONDERFUL (sarcasm intended) wife sent me out to get the mail while they were still here.  This is when the bitching began.

“You need to sweep out this garage, the leaves are from last fall and there shouldn’t be any cobwebs in here”  First off Anne had been sweeping for the past couple of weeks for the garage sale and secondly…ITS A GARAGE!!!!!  Leaves and spiders get in!!!!!

“I cleaned the blinds in the garage (these are for the window in the garage that we totally forgot existed) and they were filthy, you should clean them more often”  Again we forgot the window was there. We haven’t touched the blinds in the garage once since we moved in two years ago so she can shove that up her ass!

“Let me show you something, these seeds and grass in the rock bed here needs to be removed, your kids should come out here and pick it all out by hand”  My children have a VERY busy schedule, greatly reducing the amount of time for them to do it, by the time they would have finished, a little here a little there, the leaves would have been falling.

“When your son is mowing the lawn you should be out here watching him.  He is too young to be doing it alone and you could get in trouble because he is under the age of 12″  My son does a mighty fine job of mowing the lawn.  There is no law against having a ten year old mow the lawn.  I wish she would just stop sticking her ass sniffing nose in our f***ing personal business.

Then she goes on and on and on and on about how much time and effort goes into maintaining a house.  Yes it does when you are the EVIL ANAL RETENTIVE LANDLORD WHO DOESN’T KNOW WHEN TO SHUT UP AND DOESN’T REALIZE THAT PAINTING WOOD SIDING EVERY YEAR DOESN’T HELP UNLESS YOU EVENTUALLY STRIP IT AND REPAINT IT.  THE PAINT KEEPS COMING OFF FOR A REASON!!!!!!!!!

So that was the 20 minutes of my life that I will never get back all because Anne had to have the mail right away!!!

As a follow up to yesterday’s post about people being money hungry.  We did receive a reply to our email and I just thought I’d be nice and share it with all of you…(since I know just how much you love it!)  The only thing I have changed from the original email is the removal of names.

—- & —-,

First of all the DJ was only $15.00 per attendant which —- and I also
paid each and up and above that antoher $130 out of our own pocket.  I
never said it was going be around $20.00 where you got that from I have no
clue, what was said as that we’d try and keep it as cheap as possible,
sorry that you got the wrong information.  If you would have been there
when planning it, you would have known excatly what was going on instead
of relying on information from a third party.  Further more we never said
people couldnt take food when they left, people did take food at the end
and what people did with the food is their choice i.e. food at ——’s
party, we never supplied them food for the party.  Yes the shower was for
Bride & Groom and thats why all the are attendants contributing.  You say
I have no business about what you do with your money, you have no business
with what I do with mine and I’ve WORKED HARD for everything I have.
Further more —- told us that she doesnt agree with what you spend your
money on and you should be paying us the money.

Thanks,
—- ———

Yep—- that’s it.  That’s the response we received.  I have yet to reply.  Personally, she makes me feel like I am in high school again. I mean seriously, she’s at least 10 years older than me yet acts like a teenager.

So, if we do reply, what do you think we should say?

Oh, before I forget to mention, she also made a comment along the lines that I don’t let the Hardworking Hubby make any decisions or allow him to speak for himself and he’s so p****y whipped that he’ll do anything I tell him!

WOW!!!